fixed

last night i fell asleep with gum in my mouth. i also had the best dream of my life. goes like this:

i was staying at a place which remarkably resembled 3rd grade summer camp when i decided i needed to take a bath. it was pouring outside so i sat down in the mud and it started to sink below me forming a de facto bathtub. suddenly i went from enjoying my luxurious mudbath to being totally creeped out by all the disgusting shit crawling around in the mud with me: leeches, ticks, worms, amoebas. so i jumped up and made my way towards the house to rinse off.

With each step i took, i felt a flash of pain in my right foot. at first i thought it was a tick trying to burrow its dirty little self into the bottom of my big toe. After I rinsed off, I took a closer look at what appeared to be a splinter or a small thorn. I pushed the skin around the splinter until the tip of it popped up.

With one big sweep, I pulled out the foot long branch covered in thorns that I have been walking on for the past two years. Whoever says that dreams are a bunch of random crazy shit with no meaning doesn't know what the hell they are talking about.